I was scrolling on Facebook and found this article.
It has valid points through out, but it’s a little old fashioned. It makes me sad to think about. I’ve definitely thought about marriage, what person hasn’t? I am not sure exactly how I feel about marriage personally. I remember when I was in high school I learned that my dad didn’t believe in marriage. I was completely floored by this realization. Once he explained it to me I could see why. His stance is that he doesn’t need a paper from the government to prove his love and commitment. I can understand that and respect that. If you’ve read my posts before you will know that I posted about my parents and their Love at First Sight story. It’s truly amazing. But back to marriage! I know I am not sure what I want out of my future. For the longest time I assumed I wanted a house, pets, a husband, and kids. Only this year did it hit me when I was talking with Quick Silver and Andy that I might not want kids. Quick Silver has mentioned that he thinks he wouldn’t be a good father. I personally think differently, but whatever. As I was talking with them about the future I realized what a responsibility it would be to have a child. The financial obligation is extraordinary. Not only that, I personally, being a perfectionist, would want to make sure my kid had the perfect childhood. There’s no such thing as the perfect childhood. I would hold too high expectations of myself and whoever my partner would be. That’s when I realized maybe kids aren’t for me- at least not until I’m 35, maybe then I’ll revisit the issue.
Then I was thinking about my future in terms of a house, husband and pets. I know for sure I want a dog and cat. That is not going to change, but then I thought about having a house. I grew up in a big house. Basement, main floor, upstairs, and attic. The house has so many rooms. The previous owners had I think four or five kids, hence why there’s so many rooms. I honestly, when I am out there on my own don’t want a big house. It’s too much work and it’s expensive. I would rather have a small house or be in an apartment for a while on my own. Thinking about a husband well jeez! Ever since my father told me that he didn’t believe in marriage but married my mom because he knew she and her family believed in it my views have shifted. I grew up thinking that marriage was the end goal. It was the end all be all. But as I’ve grown up over the years I am not sure if it’s the end all be all. I know that I want my career to be very successful. I really want to thrive in whatever path I take. I feel like if I have a great career and great friends that’s all I really need. Of course a long term partner would be nice. I really do value real relationships. I am not into one night stands or random long term hookups with no commitment like most of my generation is. If I’m with someone then I’m with them. And as my dad said, I can understand why marriage is a social construct that isn’t necessary, especially in today’s age. There are however benefits to being married as my dad explained. My dad also said, “Don’t wait to marry the person, if you wait you’ll never do it. It’s better to do it quick.” He told me that when I said that I thought that you shouldn’t marry the person if you haven’t known them for two years. He knew my mom for three months and then they got married and are still happy to this day. Thirty six years. I can only hope to live up to my parents where romance is concerned. I am not sure where I lie on the issue of marriage. One half of me really wants to eventually get married. But the other half is ambivalent about the idea of marriage. I am only twenty-one and I know my views will shift over time. What is your opinion on marriage? Do you think the article is correct about men these days?