So I went to the barbecue last night and Serena and I had fun. Once Cody got there we talked and then we took a walk on the beach and down the rock path that leads into the ocean. It was really cold out there but we talked and hugged to keep warm. We stayed out there for a while and eventually went back to the group. I had to drive Serena home but Cody asked if I was going to come back to hang so I said yeah.
I got back and everyone was going over to someone’s house. Cody followed me back to my house so I could drop off my car before we went to the house. When we got there we had some beers and played pool. Cody ended up kissing me on the couch at the end of the party and we kinda made out a bit.
Then we drove back to the beach and I felt like I was in a movie because it was a classic hookup in a car. I’ve never done that, and it felt so high school. We didn’t go all the way, and he respected my decision not too and he didn’t mention it again or push it. So we had fun making out, and fooling around, and cuddling and talking… We did that until 5 AM and we got to the beach at 2 AM.
I am seriously annoyed that I like him. He seems like a cool guy so far. I just hate this generation and how it all goes with romance. Like Cody and I talk, get along, and he wants me to see him at open mic night and wants me to join him on stage for an open mic night. He also wants to see the Avengers movie with me, and he told me he would buy me a ticket ($40) for a Rise Against concert in July. So is him asking to see a movie with me a date or is it just a friends thing? But he wants to hang with me, so that’s a good sign. Plus there was little sweet things through out the night like hand holding and kissing my forehead. Like I feel like if the guy wants to hit it and quit it they wouldn’t treat the girl like…nicely. But I hate that I can’t tell with guys whether its going to be a hit it and quit it or whether the guy actually will respect you and want to date you.
I guess only time will tell… But I am honestly so confused. Also I don’t know if I wanna do the whole romance thing with him just because I am nervous. I mean, I didn’t like get any flashbacks per say to Owen but Owen entered my head a couple times while we were making out or fooling around. Plus what if Cody loses all interest once he realizes that I am not going to have sex with him… I’ll be disappointed but I’ll be fine.
I hate our generation and how the romance is reversed. I wish it were like the old days where there was some courting and getting to know another person well before being so intimate.