Monday was one of the most fun days I’ve had in a long time. I knew that Andy was going to be in the city on Monday so I told him that I would probably meet up with him at some point. Well, it turned out that Shaggy’s train was delayed, so Andy met me at Grand Central and we just talked and caught up until Shaggy got there.
At first I was not sure about it all. Andy hugged me goodbye and Shaggy and I were left to figure out what we were going to do. Shaggy and I both hate the city, and were terrible at navigating the city. We ended up just walking out of Grand Central trying to find a place to eat. It was so cold, that we just went to a McDonald’s and ate there.
So we dat down at a table and I was incredible shy. Plus there was food involved so that made me even more nervous. Shaggy was a sweetheart. There’s just this vibe about him, like a sweet puppy dog. I don’t know how else to describe it, but it’s a nice change of pace for me. One thing I liked most was that Shaggy said that I was mysterious and he had a hard time reading me.
Let me tell you, that comment made me smile. I loved it! See, Eric always said I was super easy to read and that he knew me better than I knew myself. So for someone to tell me that they couldn’t read me made me super happy.
While sitting at McDonalds Shaggy was his usual emotional self- and I say that with the utmost happiness- and was expressing his feelings. I, on the other hand, sat there quietly smiling and listening, not sure what to say. I think I told him about my dog, that passed away, that came from an abused home and wasn’t used to such kind people when he came home with us and it took him a while to warm up. I told Shaggy that’s why I was being more on the reserved side, because let’s be honest, my past relationships- romantic or not- have not been the healthiest or good.
After McDonald’s we went back to Grand Central and tried to figure out the subway system. We eventually got to the Met. Now, I for one hate museums, but it was freaking freezing, so I rather be in a museum than outside where I couldn’t feel my legs.
Walking around the museum Shaggy and I talked. We got along, and I stayed on the reserved side, while Shaggy still expressed his feelings. The whole time all I could think about was, what if I took the chance to be with him. Shaggy asked to be with me, but I said he had no idea what he was asking for.
After the Met we tried to find a Starbucks to sit in, but it was packed, so we went back to Grand Central, and sat int he dining concourse and talked.
Shaggy asked me to be his girlfriend, for like the third time now. I sat there, shocked that he still was asking. I don’t remember how we ended up talking about this but I think I mentioned PTSD and all the issues, and he told me his experiences with friends and such. Let’s just say after him opening up about things he has witnessed and gone through, it made me more comfortable. It made me comfortable enough to open up more. And he asked again if I would be his girlfriend. I told him about my most recent experience and how I was scared to take that leap of faith.
In the end I said yes. I am not one to make impulsive decisions, but I just couldn’t say no. Yes, I feel crazy about it, but my gut is telling me that there’s something good here. Eric once told me that fear shouldn’t run my life. He told me he hoped that I wouldn’t let fear stop me from anything. So remembering that, I took the chance and agreed to be his girlfriend. I then talked about triggers and Shaggy said he wanted to know, so I told him about Peter, Ethan, and Monster.
I’m in a relationship. I’m excited, and terrified all at once. This is new, and utterly crazy, but then again, if you all knew my parents love story, mine isn’t as crazy. I might make a post about their love story because it’s just that amazing.
So here is to new beginnings, not letting the past control my future, and taking chances,
XOXO Anna
Undiscovered and Exposed 